Finals Week Bingo 2018


By some complete miracle, your exam is way easier than you expected In the middle of the night, cries of anguish from the dorm windows Somebody clearing the layers of dust off the textbook that haven’t used all semester A poor, desperate soul, crying out for a spare scantron Devising various ways to break your writing hand so you can avoid your finals
Somebody drops a huge stack of notecards all over the floor Drinking absurd amounts of coffee in the hope that your bladder will explode The inevitable arrival of someone who comes to the 7 AM final in pajamas Seeing people you haven’t seen all semester come to class for the first time ever for the final Non-religious students praying for better exam grades
Discovering new levels of distraction that you thought weren’t humanly possible Looking to the syllabus over & over again because you’re not 100% sure where your final will actually be Being stressed
Eating an entire thing of ice cream to celebrate how well that final went Eating an entire thing of ice cream and crying about how poorly that final went
The collective groan when your professor says that the final is cumulative A frat dude with the uncanny ability to listen to EDM and study Big Discrete simultaneously Trying not to worry about the one final that will lock you out of your major if you fail A swarm of new converts around the campus Hindu monks hoping to channel the power of Krishna for the upcoming Orgo final The person who takes one for the team and dies so everyone can get an A
Becoming an ordained minister in the wee hours of the morning instead of sleeping Groups of students in the business building, stressfully studying in groups The one person in the cafe who is evidently stressed yet well dressed Emailing your professor and asking if you can sell your soul to them for extra credit Someone in the library giving you the death stare because your chair squeaked when you sat down