Not Just Passwords: New Rule Will Force Students to Change Legal Name Every 60 Days

The University of Central Florida has announced that, effective next month, students will be required to change their legal name every 60 days. The announcement follows the great success of the University’s bimonthly webcourses password change mandate that rolled out this past year. Administrators want to continue to spread this successful initiative into other UCF accounts such as MyUCF and KnightsMail.

“Back when students were allowed to maintain a single password year-round, there were a total of zero webcourses hacks per year,” said Head of IT Ted Peterson. “Since implementing the password change rule, there are still zero webcourses hacks per year– all thanks to students frequently changing their passwords. It only makes sense to further increase security by requiring students to change their legal names as well.”

This new policy is being implemented in order to combat the ongoing cyber attacks the university has fallen victim to in the past few years. Although webcourses has never been the target of a hack, students’ MyUCF accounts have seen breaches. Administrators claim that hackers will have a much harder time accessing students’ personally identifiable information (PII) if they change their legal name on a regular basis.

Many students are expressing concerns over this new policy because of the legal implications it could have on finding a job and applying for government programs. Others have complained that it is mentally and emotionally exhausting to create a new name once, let alone every two months.

“Do these people understand how hard it is to come up with a name?” griped sophomore Writing and Rhetoric major Sophia Belhard. “We have to write a few short stories for my writing classes and I already spend half my weekend on trying to come up with good character names. Now I have to do this for myself?”

For some students, however, the new policy is exciting. Junior Theatre major Ian Reynolds hopes to use the opportunity to improve his method acting skills. In addition to changing his name, he also intends to fully embrace a new personality and body type for every two-month period.  

“Starting next month, I’m going to be Bryce McDougall, a forty-two year-old farmer and widower who tends to his turnip crop by day and hunts for the man who killed his wife by night,” said Reynolds. “After that, who knows? The possibilities are endless.”

Despite the controversy surrounding the new policy, UCF may not stop here. Inside sources have informed the Stallion that the University is considering enforcing other bimonthly mandates such as changes in religious beliefs, political affiliation, and mandatory plastic surgery– all in the name of protecting student interests.